We were coming back from the Frei family Christmas party in Frankenmuth, Michigan. It was December 7th 1997, this was the last time I have heard from the person formerly known as “Dad” There have been times where there was “contact” since then.
When I was 16 I saw him on the corner of Gratiot and 16 mile road. I pulled up next to him in my car. I glanced over and I recognized him. He looked over and looked back at the road. I don’t know if recognized me or not, it didn’t seem like it.
When I was 22 years old, I received an email from him to tell me that a childhood friends mother had passed away. It was a 2 liner. Nothing more than this happed and this is when the funeral is. I replied to his email to say thank you for letting me know, I hoped things were going well. I guess I was kinda of expecting/wanting a reply.
I received one today, in the form of a phone call to my house, which I was not home to answer(He actually called yesterday and today, both while I was at work, but I don’t ever check my voice mails on my home phone.)
When I walked in the door of my beautiful house after coming home from my great job, to see my wonderful wife and perfect kitty, and a full dish of lasagna for my eating as I walked in. Jackie told me she loved me and wanted me to listen to a couple of voice mails.
After I listened to them, I pretended like I didn’t hear them because I was mad, but I didn’t delete them because I was sad. After nearly 9 1/3 of a year he had finally done what I had always wanted him to do. Reach out.
Right now my mind is in shambles. I didn’t expect to have to deal with this for another 10 years or so.
I have contacted my brothers and sisters, mother, friends and now I am putting it out there on the World Wide Frickin Web because that is just what I do. This is my release. A blog is kind of like a diary anyways. I have always put everything up here whenever something important has happened in my life. This happens to be one of those times.
Right now I don’t know what to do. My life is great. Everything has worked out perfectly for me. Why would I want to change anything. What does he even want anyways. I don’t know and I don’t know when/if I am going to know. I think I want to call.. I just don’t know if I am ready……….

I just don’t know.